By Patti Teel

In honor of Mother’s Day, whether we are a mother, a father, a sister, or a brother, let’s all take time to take care of ourselves.

It’s important for us to nurture and treat ourselves lovingly--but we may feel as if we’re being selfish when we do. When we take care of ourselves, everyone around us reaps the benefits. And, in order to be the loving and supportive mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, and friends that we want to be, we need to love and nurture ourselves: physically, emotionally, and spiritually. The adage about filling our own cups so that we have something to give to others is very true. It is simply not possible to give from an empty cup. When our own cups are full, we’re likely to have an abundance of energy and love to share.

I can’t help but chuckle as I remember the old saying, “When Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” If you’re a mama or papa, you can be assured that your children are affected by your happiness as well as your unhappiness. And, as their role model, taking care of yourself and pursuing your own passions gives them permission to do the same.

We can become more loving to ourselves and others by nurturing our bodies, minds, and spirits. Self-nurturing is an expression of self-love. When we nurture ourselves, we connect to the universal force (nature, energy, the divine, or whatever your respective belief is) and, from this, we gain balance. From this balance we release an infinite flow of love, which we can then pass along to others. The more love we give, the more we will receive. The more love we receive, the more we can give.

Take a few minutes to be quiet each and every day. Create time in your day whenever it works for you. Perhaps it means waking up fifteen minutes earlier or staying up a little later. You might do yoga, meditation, or take a walk.

Ask your kids how they would like to start off their day to make it more nurturing and try incorporating their suggestions. If their day starts off relaxed, so will yours.

Spend time in nature and notice and appreciate every living thing. No matter where you live, nature’s wonders abound. Take a moment to notice how a dandelion makes its way through city asphalt or notice the natural resources around you. Our fears and concerns diminish when we remember that we are part of something much greater than ourselves.

Take care of your health by exercising and eating healthy foods, even if you just commit to taking it one day at a time. Your children will notice and you’ll feel better about yourself.

Express appreciation and gratitude for the people and experiences that make up your life. Encourage your kids to find things to be grateful for and ways to show appreciation to others.

Become aware of your thoughts, directing all those that start with “I am,” toward positive statements and goals. Make it a fun project with your kids one day.

Check in with your feelings. Notice where in your body you’re carrying your emotions and take a moment to acknowledge those feelings. Take some deep breaths and look for choices in your situation that you might not have seen before.

Demonstrate compassion and empathy through your actions, words, and thoughts, not only for others, but for yourself as well. Notice all that you do well in your life, and remember that the stress, anxiety, or frustration that you feel is part of life, that it’s okay, and that it’s temporary. Try to tune into a feeling of trust that everything is as it’s meant to be.

Identify what you need from someone you love. Think of one thing that someone you know could do to make your life a little bit easier or better. Express your feelings and ask them if they’d be willing to do that for you, without being attached to the outcome. When our kids see us taking responsibility for our needs, they learn to do that also.

Life is precious and our children are only this age today, so realign your priorities, take stock of your reactions, and make room for taking care of yourself and your family. Make sure that each day you take the time to laugh and do things that bring happiness into your lives. Keep your cup full. Nurture your family by nurturing yourself.

About the Author:
Dubbed “The Dream Maker” by People magazine, Patti Teel is a former teacher and the author of “The Floppy Sleep Game Book,” which gives parents techniques to help their children relax or fall asleep. She holds Dream Academy workshops across the country. www.PattiTeel.com

May 2008